theres really a lot to tell. i wish i had a 'photo essay' cuz that would be extremely tight, but i dont. well, i have a few random photos. so ehh, just wait. i have a lot of stories that need writing. or telling. or something. i haven't been able to find a context in which they should be shared. i suppose these stories should be written down.. by hand.. in my real journal (forgive me diaryland), but i just dont have the willpower. and its really not getting me anywhere talking about this!!
to follow that lovely intro...i had a most lovely christmas. my whole family got along really well, and we just had a really fun day. my brother woke me up at 6am and when i asked him why he said because the oven had woken him up at 5:30. right-o.
not a christmas has gone by without me getting panties in my stocking (new..panties..stupid). but its cool. a girl can never have too many panties. panties is one of the best words in this darn tootin' language. so is 'tootin'. and i could go on about this...(my tootin' panties that is..) but i shall refrain and instead talk about pole vaulting.
just kidding, ill continue christmas.
i got really excellent gifts. and i cant help but feel something....not...right, because of the damned stupid commercialism of this holiday. i feel like i should be happy without stupid physical posessions...i want to feel the 'spirit' of giving and being happy with family and celebrating the beauty of the world.
wait, scratch that. i got a playstation ii.
which means that i played a lottt of tony hawk 4 today. which means my thumbs are actually sore. which means that someday.. i will be the owner of grand theft auto: vice city; and that day i will rule the world. i dont think that was correctly punctuated...i just made it up.
but i actually did mean everything i said before the mention of the psii. seriously.
one of the 'stories' of mine that needs to be written is about this year. this year needs to be reviewed. i want to take a lyrical (i dont know what else to call written words..) journey back through the year and compare myself to...myself. which reminds me, my brother gave me austin powers iii- which is incredibly amazing. it was so fucking funny. ehmmm...oh yeah....so the year in review. once i get my college essays done (TOMORROW I SWEARRRRR) then im doing that. and playing zelda. and making buttons. oh yeah, did i mention i got a button maker? yeah. fucking rocks. it was the only thing i asked for this christmas. and im so happy/ greatful/ all those other good things..that my parents got me one.
and because i cant think of any other segue...here's a picture of ryan in a chair:
(there probably couldn't be a better transition here if you tried)
dear whoever is up there/ whoever is listening, thank you. thank you for everything beautiful that occurs every day of my life. thank you for allowing me to be what i am; to do what i like; to think how i do. life is simply an amazing thing. i realize that i need to do my absolute best to not forget that; to not forget that everything i have is precious and not to be taken for granted. i realize that not everything can last forever, and when everything doesn't...that can only make me stronger. i promise to live every day as a day. to stop and appreciate the small things. to not get too angry or upset or worried because it doesn't help anything. to do things because i enjoy them- not just to please someone else. to realize the impact that everything i see/ everyone i meet has on me. from my deepest insides... thank you.
and remember to smile.
always smile.